The Book of Harold by Owen Egerton

Author:Owen Egerton
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Soft Skull Press
Published: 2012-07-25T04:00:00+00:00

Hands

I remember the first day they held hands, Shael and Harold. We had been on the road for two weeks. A little less than halfway to Austin. I was walking behind them, watching her tight shape, the beading sweat on the back of her neck. Catching some of the sadness that surrounded her like perfume. Day by day she walked closer and closer to Harold’s side. Now each step of her steps matched his.

Shael had changed as we walked. Even I, who had hardly known her before, could see how different she was. For one, she had become more Jewish. On Fridays at sunset she took to lighting Sabbath candles and saying a quick prayer in Hebrew. She always did this alone, away from us. Often, after her little ceremony, Shael would spend the rest of the evening without saying a word. She would just sit alone, lighting cigarettes with her candles.

Arms swinging closer as they walked. Her thin fingers inches from Harold’s stubby hand, almost touching, each swing a little closer. They were talking. I couldn’t make out the words, but I could hear the sounds and see their heads bob. Shael tilted her head back a little, I think she laughed.

Harold often made her smile, and smiling wasn’t a natural thing for Shael. She had a mournfulness about her. A guilt. I could see it in the way she smoked. Even before I knew her story, I could see that Shael thought she deserved to die. Each time she pushed the smoke through her clenched teeth you could see her guilt slightly eased. Her eyes would follow the smoke—another minute of her life, another chunk of lung. And if she had ever had pleasure from the tobacco, it had subsided to nearly nothing and left her with only addiction. Addiction to the nicotine and to the punishment.

I think it was her gloom that drew Harold in.

Their hands finally touched. Just fingers brushing. It was sweet, I suppose. But I found it inappropriate. Rude. I was alone, having to watch them come together.

She reached, encouraged by the touch, and took his hand firmly in hers.

Rude.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.